Day 2 of a fam of 5

Today's note will be much shorter than the last.  Not much going on today.  We awoke several times to a crying baby last night; however, it was the one we brought with us from Ky and not the one from here.  Layla is having a rough time adjusting still, some sharing probs, which we already knew and a little jealous at times.  On the other hand, Victoria had a great day.  She slept through the night and put up very little fight in going to bed.

Today began with a visit from Magda, who told us about our schedule and travel plans and lodging plans while in Warsaw.  We then took a taxi ride to the mall, which we have walked to several times already. While hanging in the mall for a while we learned that our camera can’t withstand 2 toddlers, Victoria loves McDonalds French fries and strawberry ice cream, Ryleigh will approach the record for most Happy Meals consumed in a week, Layla would rather break a cone into hundreds of pieces than eat it, Victoria fell victim to negative sibling peer pressure and decided to break her cone too, you can drop your kid off at the supervised play place for cheap and leave, and our first attempt at cooking proved to be filling, yet not real appetizing.  The burnt coal smell in air smells good in a weird campfire way.

One of the best things that happened today was strictly because of the iPhone.  At nap time, Victoria was unhappy and not wanting to go down easily.  She cried for a few minutes before my light bulb came on.  I remembered I have the Google translate app on my phone, which can translate English to polish and then say it audibly.  I typed in, “Victoria, it is time for a nap.  No more crying.”  I played it a couple times standing above the crib and nothing.  I then hid where she could not see me and played it just inside the door of her room, where she could hear it but not see me.  Not another peep.  Went to sleep and had a good nap.  Maybe the app voice sounds like a lady from the orphanage.  Whatever it was, we are grateful for the iPhone and that app.

Tomorrow we have our first visit from the adoption officials.  Hopefully all goes well and there are no Lay vs Vic battles between now and then.  Our court date as of now has been pushed back to the 13^th.  Leigh’s parents are planning to arrive the Sunday before court to help with the kids while we are gone and to help us transition to Warsaw.

This evening we talked with Kim and Camden.  It’s always nice to see a face from home and keep plugged in to all the happenings in Cynthiana, which apparently in almost under water.

Specific prayer request(s) are:

1.       Please pray for Layla and her adjustment and sleeping habits as well as Victoria.

2.       Pray that the judge decides to shorten our bonding period, which brings us home sooner.

3.       Pray that Victoria does better with bath time.

One less

Today was an eventful day in our lives.  Prior to the telling of events from today, I’ll update you on the action between Cincinnati and Katowice, Poland.  As many of you know we left out Saturday evening with a quick trip to Chicago before heading to Frankfurt and then into Poland.  Our good friends Jimmy and Heather met us at the airport to see us off, which was nice.  There was a little bit of an issue checking in with our tickets because Layla was not an actual ticket but on one of our tickets as an infant/lap ticket.  She is neither an infant or lap kinda child, as she would prove, but the price was a fraction of a ticketed seat, so we were going to make the best of it. The mix up ended up working out with us on an earlier flight to Chicago and not being charged for our extra bag.  Blessing #1. 

Our oldest, Ryleigh (5) was, and still is, pumped that she is in Poland, 49% because of Victoria and 51% because she does not have to go to school for a few weeks, though she loves her teacher Mrs. Jones.  Upon arriving to the Chicago area, Ryleigh looks out the window and says, “Daddy, the lights are so beautiful.”  Not Christmas lights, but street lights.  The stewardess on the plane called us out over the intercom.  We were taxing upon arriving and Layla (18months) had had enough.  She walked across the aisle to me for a minute and then back to Leigh.  Then we hear, “All passengers need to remain seated with their seatbelts on.”  No incidents to report on the first flight or time in the airport.  We boarded the 777 to Germany and prayed for weeks that the plane would not be full and that Layla would have some room to move so that we all, and everyone around us, would have a great flight.  Upon checking in at the gate, an older lady told us that she could not get us in the front of the common folk section where the bassinets are because they were already taken.  We explained our situation and she saw Layla running crazy and then said she would make sure that nobody was issued the seat beside us in our row.  Layla had her own seat for about $1000 less than everyone else.  Little old Asian lady, blessing #2. 

Ryleigh sat beside a German gentleman living in NM.  He had on military pants and had a camo backpack carry-on, though he never said if he was in the military.  He took right to Ryleigh and helped her all through the flight from picking up stuff she dropped to helping her eat, get buckled, and figure out the TV screen.  This meant that Leigh and I could focus on Layla, who did fairly well, with minimal crying on the flight.  German guy, blessing #3. 

Upon arrival in Frankfurt, we quickly found our gate and waited almost an hour for our final flight.  We were all tired, except Layla.  We made the quick flight into Katowice, as did all our luggage and stroller, and walked out to find our driver Tom, standing there with a smile and eager to help.  We headed to our apartment across from the large, Fayette Mall size mall with the Polish version of Wal-mart attached to it, which is open 24hours.  A quick supper and a few items from the store, we quickly headed to bed at 7pm.  Yes, 7pm local time.
With Saturday and Sunday behind us, we eagerly awoke today for an 825 trip to the orphanage for a 9am meeting.  We did not know with who or about what, what to wear, or anything.  The girls were tired but in good shape from the days travel.  Ryleigh and Layla both took to playing in the orphanage room where they would soon be meeting their new little and big sister.  After several minutes of our translator speaking with the directors and the lady from the adoption official office place, or something like that, we sat anxiously.  All we know is that she is the one writing the report about us and she was watching us.  The moment came when they asked if we were ready for Victoria.  Ryleigh’s eyes grew big, Layla was content to be eating and playing, and in came Victoria.  Ryleigh absolutely loved her.  She said, “Ahh, she is so precious.”  They played so well together and Victoria took right to her.  We stayed for a couple hours just playing while the Polish girls talked about whatever.  We did hear Americanski a time or two.  We fed her lunch, took some pictures of the facility and watched as all the ladys from caregivers to cooks came and loved on Victoria one last time.  She and Ryleigh held hands as we prepared to leave.  We were fortunate to see the other kids before we left, though they were preparing to nap. 
We really think that Victoria knew what was happening to an extent.  On our first trip we left a photo album behind of us and we were told that they had been going over it with her.  Before leaving, Victoria called Leigh “mama” a couple times and several times tonight she yelled out “mama” to her.  To our surprise, Barbara, the report writer, followed us back to our apartment and came in for a while.  Uneasy and unsure, we were still on our toes.  This, however, proved to be blessing #4.  While sitting and looking at FB pictures of the family and our lives back in KY, home of the #1 ranked wildcats, we looked at some pictures of our church.  They noticed and she asked if we were Baptist.  For a couple weeks now, I have been emailing an American pastor over here about visiting his church while we were here.  How we would get there I don’t know, but God did.  Barbara says she is Baptist and attends church here in Katowice.  I said, any chance your pastors last name is Hash and wouldn’t you know, she attends that church and called the pastor for me to speak with about our journey thus far.  She even said she would come by and get us Sunday to take us to church.  Wow.  God.
Today we learned that Victoria is definitely Layla’s sister.  They both love to eat.   Layla is having a bit of a hard time sharing and being a little jealous when I hold Victoria.  She is like a little hamster (Jenny Hyatt shoutout) and stores food in her cheeks.  We also observed some rocking at naptime, though she went down without a fight tonight.   She hates bath time.  Crocodile tears, but she cried and was cleaned, so that is something to work on.
Tonight we skyped with the Cawley’s in Africa which is always nice.  We then skyped with my mom, which went well.  Victoria is pretty aggressive with the computer.  Much like Ryleigh, she thinks that the harder you hit the key, the better it works.

Leigh and I are both on skype if you want to talk to us.  Search Hombirg and you will find us.  We also have a Polish phone number if you don’t skype and would rather call.  The number is 0 11 48 725015831.  That will cost you a little but free to us.  We are 6 hours ahead in time, so please remember that when calling.  On a side note, the exchange rate is great, almost 3.40 something to 1.

Lastly, today was a great day.  A day for remembering and reflecting.  A day where:

·         I killed my first Wii.

·         The lady’s at the orphanage really appreciated the gifts we took them.

·         Pasta with strawberry sauce is good.

·         The girls love off brand Nutella.

·         Everyone stares at us while we are in the mall. 

·         We have been to the mall twice.  Twice Ryleigh has danced.  Once in something resembling a flash mob and second with a girl demonstrating the XBOX Kinect.

·         We have about 1000 channels or so.  5 English speaking ones.  I had to push a lot of buttons to find them.

·         Leigh did not lock the mall bathroom door and surprise, cleaning lady!  Leigh also has another bathroom funny, best told in person, just ask her.

·         There is an empty bed in the orphanage tonight.

·         A family of 4 turned in to 5

·         For the first three years of her life, Victoria had nothing that was her own.  No toys, no clothes, no family.  Today that all changed, forever.

The waiting game ends saturday

Just a quick note to say that we have received our travel dates.  We are scheduled to leave for Poland this saturday and will remain there until January 12th.  We are still gathering plans and info, so more to come later.  We covet your prayers and thanks to those of you who have been praying and supporting us through this first part of our adoption journey.  More news coming as we get closer to bringing Victoria home to her forever family.
gh

Back to the waiting game

Well we are nearly two weeks removed from the last time we were with Wiktoria.  We left Poland dark and early on September 1, with no return date.  It is such an odd feeling to leave your child behind and say, I hope to come back and get you one day, but I don’t know when, or how, or where the money will come from, but I’ll be back.  We really did not say this because she would not have understood a single word of it and it is a scary reality.  However, we left her in good hands.  The ladies at the orphanage take good care of her and she enjoys being there, it is all she has ever known.

Wiktoria has only known orphanage life.  She does not have any idea if there is something better out there waiting for her.  She is comfortable where she is, ignorant to the fact that life is about to change for her.  Not that the orphanage does not have its good points for her, but there is so much more out there that she has never experienced.  This is so true in our lives today.  We Christians are going about our lives, calling ourselves Christians, going to church, praying, and so on.  It is what we do.  It is what we grew up doing and we believe that we are doing the right thing.  But there is so much more out there.  Jesus never commanded us to go to segregated churches for 1 hour a week, robotically sing, sit and listen to a guy preach, say man that was good for me, and go home, only to do it all over again next week.  This type of Christianity gets our foot in the Heavenly door, but there is so much more out there that most of us have never experienced or imagined.  What if we all were so broken that we had to pray so fervently and passionately because we really and truly believed that the only way our situation was going to improve was due to our prayers?  How would my life change if my father, who is on dialysis and battling diabetes, would only get better if I prayed?  No medicine, no doctors, no technology, no money.  Only prayer.  Just imagine we believe that what we are praying is really going to happen or really could happen, depending on the depth, or the sincerity of our prayers and belief. 

What if we received the word of God from our pastors Sunday and believed that they were giving the word to us so that we could then give it to someone else.  What if we thought that Sunday mornings were not a time for us to be fed by our pastor but a time for us to gather the spiritual food needed to go and feed others?  (Thank you David Platt.)  Are we just receivers or reproducers of the word of God?  I don’t know about your church, but the ones I have been in are not being flooded by lost people.  So maybe we should do something different than hide behind the walls hoping that the enemy’s troops will come to our side and join our army.

So here we are, waiting once again for a phone call to tell us it is time to go get our girl and take her from what she knows, what she is comfortable with, what she thinks is good, and into a whole new lifestyle, a new outlook, new beginnings and a new future.  We don’t know when we will be called, who will get the call, who will support our calling and who will pray for us while we wait and while we are gone.  Not the, “Oh, I’m praying for you” prayer, but the “I am in this with you”, “I get it” kind of prayer. 

I am looking in the mirror as I write this, not as “look at us and what we are doing”, but as a “this is what we are doing, come join us”!  My prayer life is broken and my daily walk but a limp, but I am hungry for more, ready to go deeper, with humble obedience, striving for a life of pure worship. 

Haunted

Today is our final full day in Poland and our last chance to spend time with Wiktoria for several weeks, maybe months.  However, there are a variety of emotions, different than what we expected.  It was a great week.  Today she even called Leigh mama 2 times.  We played this morning at the park, we each talked to the adoption official again through broken English, and even had a chance to take Wiktoria to the zoo.  It was a great day overall.  After the zoo, we had to take her back to the orphanage.  She is so happy there because it is all she ever knew and knows.  She does not know what a mama really is and what a dad or a family is or is supposed to look like.  She doesn’t know what it means to be tucked in bed at night.  Right now she is in a room with about a dozen cribs and it is hard to imagine that the caregivers, who do a great job, are able to give individualized attention.  She did not cry today when we left her.  She happily went to the lady working and began to play.  She doesn’t know that she is about to have a family, a big and little sister, and a forever mom and a forever dad.  Right now, all she knows are women.  How is reasonable to believe that one day she will grow up and come to learn about a Heavenly Father when she has never experienced an earthly father?
Tomorrow we fly out at 625am, having to be at the airport around 5 and getting up at 4am, making this a shorter post tonight.  We leave here knowing that Polish people do not adopt kids that are not labeled as 100% healthy.  If they are healthy, they do not stay long at the orphanage.  Tomorrow we leave this beautiful country, forever having the little faces we met burned in our memory with the realization that many of them will never have a forever family, never have the same opportunities my kids will have, or your kids will have, and grow up with all the percentages against them.  They are more likely to have addictions, be incarcerated, become a prostitute, or commit suicide.  And why?  Look in the mirror and ask that question.  Go to your church body and ask that question.  Not just for the children of Poland but for the millions of children that are orphaned both at home and abroad.  I know it’s expensive, and God has not “called” you do it.  I just can’t imagine standing face to face with God at judgment day and he asks, “Greg, what did you to defend the fatherless?”  Will I have the gumption to say, “Uh, you did not call me to do anything, so I didn’t do anything.  I did go to church every Sunday and pray and………”

So as we transition home, back to life in Cynthiana, please pray for us, for our continued efforts to raise funds, raise awareness, and for our friends and family to accept Wiktoria regardless of what they expect from her or expected her to be.  She is beautiful and looks no different in the eyes of a holy and merciful and just God than you or I do.  Jesus Christ died for every orphan, physically and spiritually.  We are striving to live as Christ, the Jesus of the Bible and not the American church Jesus.  We are haunted.

2 down, 1 to go

Day two was a long walk around and finally in the park.  We met downstairs at the hotel for breakfast at 8 planned on arriving at the orphanage at 9.  Upon our arrival, we took a walk with Wiktoria.  We had no idea where the park was, if there was one, and followed Magda around while she was on the phone.  30 minutes later, she asked directions.  Once there, we discovered Wiktoria likes to swing and eat.  She will fit in well with the ladies I live with.   After playing for about an hour we returned to the orphanage and went out to join the other kids.  This is my favorite part.  They all want to play with me and talk to me, yet I have no idea what they are saying and vice versa, yet we both keep on talking to one another.  One little fellow, Dawid, looks like a mess.  I am sure there is a story behind him, but he looks like a rascal.  You can see something in his eyes.  I picked him up and he was attached to me like a little Polish spider monkey.  He smiled and held on to me.  I would try to sit him down and he refused to put his feet down.  Wiktoria, took offense to this and ran over to me with her arms up grunting.  So I guess there is some bonding going on with us.  The other children there are just precious.  You can see that some have issues, like we all do, and others look “normal” and you have to wonder why they are there.  I did not want to leave.  The kids just liked playing and being silly, language was no barrier for them.  Love does not have to speak a language.

After leaving the orphanage, we headed to the apartment where we will be staying when we return.  It is near a large mall.  Magda says it is the largest in Poland.   They have street signs in the mall to help navigate.  The apartment facilities were nice.  They are all furnished, have tv’s, wifi, playgrounds, and a guarded entry.  We were told that there are some celebrities that live there so it is guarded and well maintained.  Afterwards, a tour of the mall was in order.  A quick trip through the Polish version of Wal-Mart showed us that everything we would need would be right there, from soup in a box, to clothes, to diapers, to a whole frozen catfish, whiskers and all.  Lunch was in the food court.  Choices range from Thai to McDonalds, KFC, Burger King, Kebabs and traditional dishes.  Leigh went with the traditional foods and I had a kebab.  There is lody everywhere in the mall.  I think it will be a great, potentially fattening place to live.  However, we have to walk to the mall to get it, so it will be our reward for the exercise of walking to the mall.  Justified. 

We then took the train back to the hotel to rest and freshen up before returning to see Wiktoria and the other children at 3.  This afternoon we stayed and played around the orphanage and played bubbles, in the ball pit and with the other kids.  Wiktoria seems to be getting closer to both of us, yet we have to leave her in a couple days and return weeks, maybe months later and do the whole thing over again.   J

Random things from today:

·         At the movie theatre here, you get to pick your seat when you buy a ticket.

·         When in the WC, and there is any question, always use the big button on the toilet.

·         Leigh had a boneless chicken leg for supper.  Who knew?  How do they walk?

·         Mountain Dew here tastes more like Kroger Dew Drop.

·         Taxi driver per day = about $85.  Riding the train = $1 per trip.

·         The mall is ridiculously big and most young folks that work there let you struggle with communicating with them a little before they respond to you in perfect English.

·         A whole catfish, skin and all, stares at you as you pass by.  You can also buy a frozen chunk of cut fish.  Bait is what I say.

·         My wife bumps into someone tonight and responds in Polish with “Good morning!”  She is great.

·         The orphanage does not use baby wipes.  Instead, you get in the sink and get hosed off and sponged down.

·         My quote to Leigh, ”I thought we bought that chocolate candy for the kids and that candy bar for Freida.”  She says, “We can buy more!”

·         There is a precious girl and little brother sibling group in the orphanage.  Who will rescue them?  Who will show them the greatest example of God’s love and how will they learn and understand and a Father’s love and the family of God if they have no father and no family?

·         We are here now.  We are getting only one.  Who will go next?

"I'm in love, I'm in love, and I don't care who knows it!"

Random movie quote from.....?

It’s august 29^th, do you know where your adopting friends are?  Well they are in Katowice trying to figure out how we were chosen to be blessed by a petite little blonde chick.  Today was our big day, we thought.  We did get to meet our daughter, but the day was not as big dramatically or emotionally as we thought.  The day started with an 8am meeting with Polish officials.  Get that mental image in your head.  We thought we'd be in a big room, lots of old ladies in nun outfits staring at us, looking for something wrong with us, speaking all fast and genuinely being scary and intimidating.  What we got instead were two young folks, in a meeting room with a kitchenette and a flat screen tv who looked just like we did.  They both spoke English and were very welcoming and accommodating.  The meeting went well and we just reviewed Wiktoria’s file and talked about our family, childcare, and casually chatted.  Most of the talking was in Polish so we just sat there and smiled and hoped it was something good. It must have been good because after about 25 minutes or so, they decided to let us go to the orphanage and meet her.

Upon arrival at the orphanage, it was nothing like the horror stories you hear about or the old school orphanages you see in the movies.  It was very modern with lots of toys, books, flat screen tv and looked just like an American day care and actually better than one I have been in most Sundays.  All the toys, shoes, clothes, jackets and whatnot were organized.  I thought this may have just been because we were coming, but later, as we were playing with Wiktoria, we saw that after she played with each toy, she put it back where she found it.  So anyway, back to the story…..we were waiting in a therapy room with a plastic ball pit, which I loved, talking to the social worker and psychologist about ourselves.  Again, a lot of conversation in Polish between the ladies there and the lady that is representing us.  They must have bought everything because they brought Wiktoria in for us a few minutes after talking. 

She was all dolled up in a little dress and had her hair fixed.  She was/is a doll.  We were prepared for screaming, gnashing of teeth, and the worst.  It went perfectly.  God could not have answered prayers any better or ordained a better child.  She was very content to play by herself, with us, whatever.  She was laid back, never cried, and soon began to open up to us.  There are a couple guys who work in and around the orphanage so she has some contact with males thankfully.  Before long, we were playing with a ball, blowing bubbles, and hammering stuff.  She looked like she was checking for studs or something.  She would walk over to a table, hit it two or three times, make a noise and walk away.  Then to a door, then a wall, and then to Leigh.  She took up with Leigh first, as expected.  We later joined the other kids outside after seeing the room where the kids slept.  She played well with the other kids.  They were precious.  Not all are up for adoption as some have been taken away temporarily by the state for various reasons.  While playing outside, Wiktoria ran up to Leigh, made a babble sound similar to Jake Lawrence, reached up for her and after being picked up, gave Leigh a hug.  The workers enjoyed seeing this and seeing that there weregoing to be any attachment concerns.

After being outside for a while, we went back in and prepared to leave.  After lunch, we would return and spend another couple hours with her, playing and bonding.  Upon our return, I knew I had some ground to gain.  As with most small children, you can throw them up gently in the air and they either respond with a smile or a look of terror.  I took my chances.  Sitting by the ball pit, I lured her over (sounds creepy) and we played with a toy.  I went for it.  She smiled and laughed.  We did this a couple more times and she loved it.  Later, she would run over to me from across the room and put her arms up which eventually led to a hug.  She would come and spread her arms out and lay her head against mine.  And you, like the SNL church lady are probably saying, “Well, isn’t that special.”  It was.  Wiktoria had taken to both of us on the first day.  The orphanage ladies liked seeing this and upon our departure this evening, she even appeared sad that we had to give her back, or she did not like what was on her supper plate.

All in all, I would say that day 1 with her was a success.  We seemed to make a positive impression with the workers there and our representative said they liked what they saw out of everyone and that there is a chance that things can move quickly after we leave as far as the return bonding time is concerned. 

Random things from today:

·         Dirty diapers stink worldwide.

·         It cost 100zl to get a boot off of your car for parking illegally over here

·         The cry of an orphan is a terrible sound, but one that has a remedy if Christians stepped up.

·         I learned that my aunt Shirley borrows Facebook accounts, like Paul used to.

·         Having friends at home that take time out of their lunch break to ask if they can pray for you is wonderful.

·         Mushroom lasagna is not very tasty.

·         My wife apparently requires one Bounty candy bar a day to function properly.

·         Driving 100+mph on the highway is okay.

·         Bums don’t stop asking even if you say in English, you don’t speak Polish.

·         Churches here and at home struggle with politics in the church.

·         The imagery of spiritual adoption and physical adoption is humbling, incredible, and amazing.  The God that brought us here wants Polish, Russian, and all orphans to grow up and love him just as he wants our middle class  biological American kids to.  But how will they ever hear?

·         We have to have a major stuff reduction sale when we get home so we can come back here and bring this little girl home with us. Adoption fees are bad and unexpected costs stink.